Washington, DC

Stonewall and I took a four day weekend. For the past six weeks Stonewall has been working non-stop, weekdays and weekends, so he was ordered to take a 4-day pass. With the holidays coming up, we decided to save some money and we spent the first two days at home. However, a vacation would not be a vacation if you didn't go somewhere. We decided to take a trip to our nation's capital. (To get the full effect, please say the words "our nation's capital" as Forrest Gump would say them. Try it. You'll feel better.)

I love Washingon, DC. As does Stonewall. I love cities, in general. I could probably never actually live in a city because I would feel the constant need to wash my hands every time I touched anything. I do love visiting cities though. The hustle and bustle, and there is always something to do. In good ol' Po'dunk, PA businesses (and we're talking any business, even those of the food and beverage variety) close down by midnight. Even the bars which stay open until 2:00 AM tend to stop serving food after 11:00 PM. I love a place where I can call for Chinese at 3:00 AM and get chow mein delivered. Plus, and Stonewall wholeheartedly shares this enthusiasm, there are museums. Lots and lots of museums. We are both lovers of history. I prefer the pop culture history, whereas Stonewall goes more for the "stuff they teach you in school" kind of history. And let's face it, DC has all sorts of military monuments, so any American and military member can't help but feel an extra sense of pride while gracing our nation's capital. So needless to say a place like Washington, DC gets us both super excited.

I've got to admit though, my favorite part about any vacation is the food. It's not like they don't serve normal American food in DC, because they do and a lot of it. What they don't serve is Po'dunk, PA food and halleluhjah to that! (My perfect date is dinner at a restaurant. Restaurants are amazing. No, I'm serious, I'm not mental. Whoever came up with the idea to create a common eating place for people not of the same family, was a genius. People watching on a park bench is fun, but watching people interact at the dinner table is a whole different ball game. Not mention awesome food you didn't have to cook and plates you don't have to clean.) DC does not disappoint in the way restaurant choice. When we had to make reservations on Sunday night, I was ready to cry. There were so many choices and they all made me very happy.

We finally decided to eat at Legal Sea Foods. Stonewall and I both grew up with crab crackers in our little fists, so a good seafood restaurant with a raw bar: heaven. Of course we had to start with oysters. Yes, raw oysters. Everyone should try an oyster at least once. Just remember, don't chew, just swallow. Pile on some cocktail sauce, lemon juice and take that puppy down. We also had their famous clam chowda, which has graced the table at the past six Presidential Inaugerations. For dinner we both indulged in lobster. Stonewall had the clam bake with a two pound lobster and I had the lobster pot pie. Out of all the seafood places I've been, this one gets an 8 out of 10. (They didn't have the oysters I wanted to try, so they lose a point for that and I'm pretty sure there was a scallop in my lobster pot pie, so that's another point.) However, this is a very high 8, almost a 9.

We're already making plans to go back to DC again. A few things to remember for next time:

• Museums close at 5:30, so get an early start.


• Take your blood pressure medicine if you're driving.


• Take your compass, map, GPS system, nerves of steel, "Oh Shit!" bar, a crowbar to pry your nails from your husband's arm and learn to read the stars if you're the navigator/passenger.


• Go to Union Station first or a Metro parking lot because parking does not exist anywhere else in DC unless you have a permit or $40 in quarters.


• If your husband is breathing and he has access to a video camera, he will zoom in on your boobies even though the entire museum is watching.